Living in a multicultural society has taught me a lot of things. It has taught me that happiness is transient. That being tied to your culture, is putting too much importance on yourself and having no time to appreciate the world around you. It´s pretty much like being a horse with blinders. You only see what is infront of you, and the rest is a blur.
I love my country like all immigrants/emigrants love theirs. In fact, I always tell myself no country could replace The Philippines..... make that, My Philippines. This is probably one of the reasons why I´d like to think that my only homeland is in music. Because when I play music, I am home. And in that home, I am happy. No gossips. No debasement. No betrayal. No inflicting of pain. No abuses. In that world, I am safe.
But that's not all there is to life. So we adapt. We evolve. And in my case, I have to let go of this sense of disproportionate importance that I've attached to myself. Of that feeling that the only culture I could truly love and consider home, is my Philippines.... or my music. I have to let go of self-importance.
That I am so important I feel justified to be annoyed of everything. That I am so important, I could afford to leave if things don´t go my way. That I am so important, I could pretend that I know better and could shove my views down the throat of others. That I am so important, I don't need people to understand me.
All of that has to go. Because holding on to that feeling, is not treating the people around you as equal. You put too much importance on the self.
2 comments:
wow - it takes a lot of maturity and humility to do that, and i salute you, my dear friend, for going this far in your personal journey.
in my case, i am still in the process of adjustment, getting used to the new culture i am in. but i realize that, for my sake, i must learn to appreciate where i am now because there's no turning back the time. but there is beauty as much as there is ugliness in every culture, precisely because the people who perpetuate it are imperfect.
i'll take your lesson to heart - let go of self-importance. if i don't, it implies that i am far more superior to others, which is not really the case.
Well, it´s just a thought. Thinking is easy. The doing part is hard. We´ll see....
But since I had this realisation, I actually feel more light in my heart. I don´t know. It could be just a fleeting feeling. :)
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